I've been in Sedona, Arizona, only three days and it already feels like a lifetime. It's beautifully balmy weather, almost hot at times. Feel very lucky to be enjoying the warmer weather, while the East coast is being pummelled by snow and freezing temperatures. NOT looking forward to going home next week!
This trip is one of the most extreme examples of the path I am currently on: to fully trust my instincts and just go with the flow of life.
Two weeks ago, I was meditating, preparing to teach class. My mind's eye showed Banya, director of
Sedona Story and I had this distinct, very strong feeling I needed to go and train with her. Always supportive, Master Daniel gave her a call after class and before I knew it, I had booked a private
vortex meditation tour and crystal palace training with her in Arizona, after our weekend in Alta.
Needless to say I was excited, yet also a bit apprehensive. I was not sure what to expect, so I just kept focusing on trusting my gut feeling and putting doubts aside; reasoning that Banya is an intuitive healer and spiritual guide, so surely all will work out well.
I met her last time I visited
Mago Garden Retreat, in Sedona. It was during a Dahn Gong (similar to T'ai Chi)
workshop and our instructor had arranged for a group reading in town. She taught us how to connect heart to heart with another to help guide someone. I was impressed and captivated by her knowledge, kindness, a lightness as well as a deeply centred, grounded feeling that surrounded her.
Once the wheels started turning, everything falls into place: A friend from a previous workshop offered to put me up and I gladly took him up on his hospitality.
We met early morning for the vortex hike. (
Click here to discover more on energy vortexes.) Now I had no idea where we were going and was very curious to see where she would lead me. I was fervently hoping we'd be going up Bell rock, however felt Cathedral Rock was also a strong contender. Once she saw me she went:
Bell rock it is! which thrilled me no end. I'd always wanted to climb right to the top.
It was quite an enjoyable hike. Once up there, we meditated for a while, focusing on receiving messages from the rising sun, before building a little rock tower. Each rock contains one prayer. I felt light and free, yet solid and anchored at the same time. My message was "trust, create, let go of fear". It was extremely empowering to stand on the top of that rock and feel that message deep inside.
On our way back to town, we got chatting about past lives. Naturally I was curious and booked a session later that afternoon.
We started out with me lying comfortably on my back. I closed my eyes and slowly started feeling my body getting heavier and heavier. Then felt it getting lighter and lighter. She asked me to visualise a place where I feel safe and secure and imagine myself there. I chose my studio back in NYC. Felt myself lying on the mat, soaking up the feeling of peace and security surrounding me. Next she guided me to see a door appear on one of the studio walls. I approached it and placed my hand on the doorknob. Once I felt ready I swung the door open and hurtled myself through, deep into the void. It was an eerie yet comfortable feeling, this flying deeply into the darkness (which somehow was very bright at the same time). At some point she asked me to breathe deeply and slowly come to rest. I should look around and describe what I feel, see, hear.
At first it was just all dark. I started to doubt this practise until I realised that something was covering my head and that my chest was heavy with the dull feelings of sadness, loneliness and fear. I knew I was wearing clothes made from very rich fabric and that I was a young man, some kind of aristocrat. The surroundings (which I did not see, head being covered, but instinctively knew) were extremely ornate and precious. I was wealthy and being held captive, accused of something. I was afraid for my younger sister. The name Emilie or Amelie came to me. She was very bright, dressed in white, pale skin, golden curls or wearing a white band around her hair. We were both going to face the guillotine. I did not know where my parents or rest of the family were. I felt I was a victim of the masses, an angry mob (of lower classes) and for some reason I could understand their anger and felt helpless to do anything about it.
To be honest, at the beginning and sometimes throughout I wondered if this was all just my imagination, but the more I hesitated to speak, the stronger the feelings got. So I just let go and allowed the impressions to come. She had warned me that there are many past lives we go through and not all of them were pleasant.
Banya saw more than I did and shared that she not only saw me clothed in rich fabric with very ornate shoes, but also felt a certain lonesomeness and disconnect from society. She went on to say that my parents seemed to be the same parents in this lifetime (not necessarily in the same roles) and that I had been accused of something and they were afraid for me. She saw a deep love for the sister but was not sure there really was a blood bond between us.
While I had been in darkness, she had also seen another life for me: as a young Buddhist monk. Somewhere in a mountainous region, like Nepal, close to Tibet. The loneliness and disconnect was apparent too in that life. I seemed to be searching for my meaning in life. My parents supported me in going to the monastery, even if they did not understand it. The energy she perceived as my now husband (Manuel) was there too, as a friend (also a monk) and we helped each other along our spiritual path.
This reading was interesting but as we know, past lives do not really impact our current life. They can help us recognise patterns, in my case the feeling disconnected from society and a sense of searching and loneliness are definitely also present in this life time.
I feel very blessed that I have people in my life who have been with me in previous lives before.
